Losing Todd, A Mother's Journey
In Honor of 1LT Todd Weaver
KIA - Sep 9, 2010
Soon after Todd was killed, I told a journalist who came to the house for an interview that I needed to nurture Todd's death in the same way I nurtured his life. A few weeks after Todd was killed, our family sat in the living room discussing what we might do to create a legacy in memory of him. Many meaningful tributes honoring Todd's life and service to our country came to fruition from that conversation.
I remember saying, “What will I do?” They answered in unison, “Mom, you will paint!” Visions of fire, anger, ugliness filled my mind. I thought, "I can’t paint that. Todd was too special." But as time passed and I began to listen to others' tributes to Todd, those early visions were replaced with reflections on beauty, honor, and love. In time, with the grace of God, I began to paint.
The studio had been closed on the day we received the grave news. Canvases were unfinished. Paint brushes were caked with dried paint.
Four months after Todd's death, I reopened my studio and began to paint in memory of my son. I did not know its purpose. I did not think about its healing benefits. I just knew I had to paint.